“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” Michelle screamed as she entered her fourteen year old daughter’s bedroom and saw her husband fondling their daughter’s breast. “Get out! GET OUT NOW!” she ordered her husband.
A few seconds of truth began a nightmare journey for Michelle, her fourteen year old daughter, and her eight year old son. The night would reveal disturbing facts. Michelle’s husband and the father of her two children had molested their daughter. He had begun his violation five years earlier and gradually escalated his abuse. He was prosecuted and convicted of child molestation, aggravated child molestation, sodomy, aggravated sodomy, incest, and rape.
Michelle championed her children’s safety from the moment she discovered her husband’s conduct. With quiet determination, Michelle filed for divorce, changed her telephone number, relocated, changed her name, and cooperated with police and prosecutors. She was threatened by her husband’s family, tolerated harassment and stalking tactics including funeral music being played on her telephone answering machine, multiple hang-up calls, telephone calls from prison, letters from the abuser, attempts to access the children’s school records through FERPA provisions, and multiple court proceedings blocking his access to the very child he raped.
Michelle supported and protected her children, secured counseling, relocated, and sought all assistance to ensure their safety. Her daughter was temporarily instutionalized for suicidal ideations after therapy revealed not only had her father violated her, but he had allowed his two adult brothers to rape her as well. Michelle’s daughter had been sexually abused by three adult males for five years.
Realizing she could not control what had happened, Michelle did realize she would control how she responded to it. Protecting her children had been her first priority. Her second priority became helping other mothers of abuse victims become educated regarding how to best help their children in the aftermath of such intimate violations. Confronting the dynamics of family violence, Michelle became a spokesperson for her local victim service unit and conducted presentations in the state penal system, addressing felonious populations regarding the impact of crime on the lives and families of their victims. Often moved by her story, inmates would share with Michelle their concern for her and her children and they would also convey how they had never thought of their victims suffering until they heard Michelle’s story.
A tireless advocate, Michelle graduated Magnum Cum Laude in Psychology, expanded her service skills to include Crisis Response Team membership, responding to the Olympic Park Bombing in Atlanta, Georgia in 1996, and the Pentagon Terrorist Attacks in 2001. When asked why she advocates for others Michelle stated, “I do this work because I will not allow his violations and his abuse to dictate my life and the lives of my children. Yes, it happened. It was a dark period in our lives Ð but we SURVIVED. Others can SURVIVE. I do this work to help minimize the pain and suffering of other innocents and to let them know help is available should they be confronted with crime and violence in their lives .”
Are you a Predators Survivor Hero? Do you know someone that was a victim of crime and has moved beyond his or her situation to make a difference for others? If so, we want to hear from you about this true survivor! Please send your suggestions to us via our Contact Us page.
Lessons from Batman
Written by Jeff McKissack
“The Dark Knight” is still breaking box office records. Working with Christian Bale’s fight trainers from the Keysi Fighting Method (www.keysikfm.com) as I do, there were some distinctive reasons this system was used in the film, reasons that we non-comic book icons need to be aware of as well.
Rarely do attackers come one at a time. One thing that was markedly different about this Batman franchise are the numerous scenes of simultaneous multiple attackers. Unfortunately, this is a statistical fact now in our society and whatever “training” you receive needs to take this into account…key being ‘simultaneous’ attackers, not the “pick a number” approach.
You can never afford to go back. When Batman takes on these attackers, you’ll quickly note he never goes back…and neither can you. As KFM Co-Founder, Andy Norman, puts it, “When you enter-you destroy.” You have to make sure that the person you “just” dealt with does not factor into the rest of your battle.
YOU are the predator! We have to change our mindset where we have become “prey” to the criminal element. This takes training, and not just physical training. There is a paradigm shift that must take place in the psyche to insure that when danger strikes, you are in control making the first strike. In KFM, their tagline or slogan is “Redefining Predator and Prey.” This must take place in the mind before it will in the body.
For a closer look into KFM and its approach to personal defense as well as its impact now in the USA, check out www.hulu.com.
Used with permission from J.A. Hitchcock, from the book Net Crimes & Misdemeanors 2nd edition (netcrimes.net)
In the past, singles met available dating partners mainly at social events and through introductions by mutual acquaintances, but the Internet has opened up a whole new world of possibilities. Today, with seemingly endless opportunities for making a good match online, the potential for trouble is also on the rise. Online personal ads, dating services, and chat room romances can and do lead to deception, violence, andin rare caseseven death.
Michael Halloway of Kentucky was sentenced to life for murdering a woman he met on the Internet. Stacy Dodson would drive to Louisville to meet Halloway and in October 2001, he kidnapped her at gunpoint, put her in the trunk of his car, then drove to a local park where he shot and killed her. His motive: simple larceny.
William Miller of Missouri met Joann Brown in a chatroom. She went to live with him in 1998 and a few months later he killed her, put her in a well, and filled it with cement. Two weeks later he called the authorities, claiming the shooting was an accident. He’s currently serving a 25-year sentence.
Of course, these are worst-case scenarios. Episodes of online dating gone wrong typically lead to disappointment, frustration, anger, and occasionally concerns about one’s safety, with relatively few resulting in loss of life. Still, it can happen.
Personal Ads
Personal ads can be great for the individual who wants to meet someone online, but they are sometimes misused, typically with revenge as the motive. The way it works is that the vengeful party places an ad in the other person’s name, including a provocative “profile” along with personal information like a home phone number and address. This can be very dangerous if the wrong person reads the ad.
“A woman, the ex-wife of a friend of my brother, decided to harass me by making up a profile using my name in the Yahoo! Personals,” Anita says. “Why she did this, I still don’t know. She solicited men to ‘fantasy rape’ me and gave out my phone number and address. As a result, I had over 400 men approach me. It was pure terror.”
Yahoo! was cooperative. They canceled the account in question and held all the information regarding it for subpoena. But local police claimed they couldn’t do anything for Anita even though she was put in harm’s way.
“What if one of those men tried to rape me?” Anita says. “I ended up confronting this woman, telling her that Yahoo! had all the evidence and if she didn’t stop I’d sue her. She stopped.”
Marie started receiving phone calls asking about a Personals ad she’d supposedly placed on Yahoo!.
“I had no idea what they were talking about,” Marie recalls. “I checked Yahoo! Personals and sure enough, there was an ad placed about me. It listed my name, that I was looking for a ‘bisexual female,’ and it also listed my home and cell phone numbers.”
Marie received phone calls about this ad for days and she became stressed over it, not to mention humiliated. She finally changed her home and cell phone numbers and made sure neither was publicly listed. She had to contact Yahoo! several times before they pulled the ad. She never found out who placed it.
If you have something to share, please send it to us via our Contact Us page.
Recommended Reading
Finding Angela Shelton
Finding Angela Shelton is a memoir of courage, survival and faith. It is the journey of a young woman who discovers herself in the stories of other women who share her same name and coincidentally share experiences of violence and abuse that plagued her own childhood. Through her physical journey across the country she is thrust into her own emotional journey. She embraces each woman she meets, is strengthened by their connections, confronts the father that molested her, and ultimately finds faith, divine purpose, and wholeness.
About the Author
Angela Shelton is an award-winning actress and filmmaker. She made her directorial debut with her documentary Searching for Angela Shelton in which she drove around the country meeting other women named Angela Shelton. She found that 70 percent had been victims of sexual assault or domestic violence. This surprising journey led Angela to confront her own abusive past. The multi-award winning documentary has started a grassroots movement of survivors and humanitarian organizations around the world to expose the extent of abuse suffered by American women. Angela received a certificate of appreciation from the United States Justice Department for her work and dedication on behalf of America’s crime victims. She was also presented the Voice of Courage award from Darkness to Light, an organization with the goal of ending childhood sexual abuse. And she received the Award for Distinguished Service and Excellence in Film Media from The Leadership Council for Child Abuse and Interpersonal Violence and the Family Violence and Sexual Assault Institute in 2005. Angela has appeared on Oprah and 48 Hours Investigates. An exclusive version of her documentary, Searching for Angela Shelton aired on Lifetime TV in April 2006. In addition, Angela stars as the Safe Side Super Chick superhero who teaches children how to be safe in the Safe Side video series created by Baby Einstein creator Julie Clark and America’s Most Wanted creator, John Walsh. She won a regional Emmy for her performance in this video series in 2005.
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Quote of the Month:
"Hope is that thing with feathers that perches in the soul and sings the tune without the words and never stops… at all." Emily Dickinson
While you are away from home, give the impression your place is occupied by using timers on your lights and radio or television.
Questions for the Predators Team:
Do you have a question or comment about a particular type of crime? Email your questions to the Predators Crime Prevention Specialist - Retired Officer Carl Duke!
If you have been a victim of a predator related crime and would like to submit your story for the Predators book, please send it to us at info@predators.tv.
We would like to thank Matthew Upton at MNM WebWorks for sponsoring this newsletter and the Predators web site.
